Through the Eras: How Taylor Swift’s Music Has Shaped My Life

I’ve grown up loving music. My first ever CD was Taylor Swift’s fourth album, Speak Now, and I have fond memories of dancing in my living room to “You Belong With Me” from Fearless. She has consistently been my most-listened-to artist for as long as I can remember. I’ve definitely had my moments of getting tired of listening to the same songs over and over again, but in the end I always seem to come back to listening to her. There’s something about her lyrics that rings so true to me. I think this is the case for millions of people, which is probably why she’s so popular. She has a specificity that gives such a personal touch to everything she publishes, yet the songs are just general enough to convey a raw emotion that can apply to the life of most anyone.

Music can be an anchor. It can be a getaway, it can be a way to vent, it can be a lifeboat, and, in my experience, it can be the one source of stability in a tumultuous world. I’ve always felt that her albums, and “eras,” tended to coincide with the seasons of my life. I say this not in the sense that we have lived similar lives, but the messages and lessons she has detailed through each body of work have been oddly relevant to situations I’ve found myself in. This is especially true of her albums Fearless, Reputation, and Folklore. Let me explain.

FEARLESS

Teenage pining, self-discovery, and fairytale dreams

I was raised in Newark, Delaware and lived in the same house for 17 years. Thinking back to my childhood, my memories appear to me as photos from an old digital compact camera would. My mom used to wake up the whole house blasting her Christian radio station and vacuuming, and I would run out to the living room to feel the summer breeze wafting through the open windows. I was a happy kid; I felt safe and like everyone was my best friend.

My biggest passion was performance. Whether it was playing the display pianos in Costco (badly), putting on talent shows in the living room for my parents, or playing music way too loudly on Youtube in my room and making up choreography, I found a way to infuse my love for singing into pretty much everything I did. One of my favorite songs was “Fifteen,” which has one line in particular that sticks out to me today:

“Well, count to ten, take it in, this is life before you know who you’re gonna be.”

When I listened to that song as an 8-year-old little girl, I took a lot of comfort in those words. I found so much freedom in enjoying my youth and having the space to grow into any kind of person I wanted to be, which I am so grateful for. Nothing could top my excitement for going to high school and having my first boyfriend, and I really couldn’t think of anything that would take away from the picture-perfect image I had crafted in my head.

REPUTATION

Resilience, vulnerability, and growth from ashes

Suffice to say, things weren’t perfect. Boys weren’t as nice as I expected them to be. Suddenly, I felt judged for eating in public. Most of all, I felt alone. My brain started telling me things that I didn’t want to think about: that my friends didn’t actually like me and people I looked up to weren’t who I thought they were. I was so angry at the world for reasons I couldn’t pin down. Reputation came out, and I could relate to Taylor just wanting to curl up into a ball and hide. At some point, a person just gives up caring about certain things in order to get out of that slump. I will admit that I made some questionable decisions during that period (namely, dyeing my hair bright pink), but it was the only way that I could feel in control. “I Did Something Bad” got me through some dark thoughts, just by encouraging me to take things into my own hands and stop worrying about everyone else’s opinions.

“They say I did something bad, then why’s it feel so good?”

There were a lot of rumors circulating about me at that time. I was described as crazy, needy, and vengeful, when in all reality I was desperately trying to heal what had been broken in me. That album is not just about taking back a narrative, but it’s about finding love in the midst of chaos. Hope was all I could cling to; I stopped talking to a lot of people who were important to me and I just yearned for someone to understand my heart.

FOLKLORE

Peace in solitude, reflection, and acceptance of complexity

When Folklore was released, I immediately recognized its words as my own thoughts. There is plenty of talk of heartbreak, but it mostly comes from a place of reflection and effort to move forward.

Starting college has been a rough adjustment for me. I’ve come face to face with a lot of the issues I tried to run away from. This has forced me to juggle a lot of hats and grow into a person who can adapt to most circumstances. I think this is a common experience for people going out to be on their own for the first time, but I especially find myself behaving in vastly different ways from situation to situation. Throughout it all, I try to maintain my core being and stay positive. This has prevented some challenges, but if I lose myself then what will I have left? “Mirrorball” is really my soul’s song, and I even have a poster of its lyrics hanging on the wall of my dorm room.

“I’m still a believer, but I don’t know why. I’ve never been a natural, all I do is try, try, try.”

I think of this song when I feel myself slipping away. It reminds me that I can be multifaceted, put in the work to keep the people I love, and try new things.

This is really what Taylor Swift’s music does for my life; I’m reassured that even in my imperfection, I have so much to offer and I am capable of being loved and loving others. The deeply personal nature of her writing can hit each inner emotion and help me make sense of them. I don’t feel so alone when I hear someone else singing about the same things that I struggle with. To me, there is extraordinary value in that, no matter how mainstream or commercialized her work becomes. Writing music, listening to music, and sharing music with others brings such beautiful connections to my life in ways that other mediums just can’t reach. It’s made me who I am, and it continues to shape me every day.

Clara Kelly