By Soffie Paul
I recollect grinning ear to ear during winter break as I unboxed my first mouse - yes, an HP computer mouse to replace the old mouse my parents bought before I was born. The old mouse now stays in India, still stuck together with wads of tape. Finally, I have something new to pair with my work laptop to play video games - a privilege I can enjoy today.
It wasn't always like this; I was taught to be grateful for technology, even if they could not run the simplest games. My only option was to use what we had to the best of our abilities.
You can imagine my plight when I chose to double major in Game Studies and Esports - I was suddenly surrounded by people who knew the latest and oldest games, alongside their history and reputation. As left out as I felt, it gave me a lot to think about regarding how my culture and access to technology have affected my creative thinking and capabilities as a "gamer"... if I really was one.
Playing video games was a newfound luxury on my college campus, and I am so, incredibly blessed to have that opportunity. The effect that video games and technology have left on my life is something that many others can relate to, regardless of location. With how fast the world morphs into its digital form, it is more important that we start to consider what we do with the parts of the world that cannot access them.
Additional Caption: The dragon in this GIF is Parthurnaax, one of my favorite characters from the video game, Skyrim. He is well known for his wisdom and knowledge. A quote of his that has stuck with me says, "What is better: to be born good, or to overcome evil with great effort?"
My oldest memory relating to video games was watching my cousin play on the consoles our family bought for him. I always showed interest in playing video games - from borrowing his consoles to bragging about my in-game achievements, I knew it was an art form I wanted to pursue. However, the luxury of having hobbies is unheard of in undeveloped countries, especially if it requires a large investment. Only one of the two children in my family could have that, and of course - it went to the boy.
Cultural divides and gender roles are necessities in determining technological and even educational access for many nations. Many underdeveloped countries hold on tightly to traditional values, so much so that they become unwelcoming of new ones.
This, however, didn't stop my cousin. He saw that I had a particular obsession with trying video games. Our fondest memories together include me gradually becoming better than him in any game we tried. I talked about the story and the difficulty while showing great promise in my attempts to finish it. He downloaded an emulator on my mom's computer, marking the most important moment in my introduction to video games.
Additional Caption: This GIF reminds me of me and my cousin brother! (I'm Bart Simpson, obviously. ;) )
Hence, my first "console" was a free Nintendo DS emulator that mimics the performance of a real-life console. To this day, I attempt to find ways to get games without paying or pirating.
Looking back, I believe this has enhanced my ability to use any given resources to the fullest potential. Video games were golden experiences that were rare to find, so any exposure to them was something to remember. Even after technology advances in India, people do not consider gaming respectable due to the price and time invested to obtain something "beneficial".
While we have the potential for digital greatness, we do not pursue it out of our traditional values. Regardless, our fun on these free games was immeasurable, further solidifying stories and mechanics in our hearts. This scarce hobby and limited resources only drove our passion for video games further, helping us develop stories and ideas in ways no English textbook could. Although it wouldn't have happened without the lack of consoles, we still desired the feeling of a handheld resting in our palms.
I recollect laying my fingers on a gaming keyboard for the first time in my freshman year of college when I visited the Esports Arena, the hotspot for gamers across campus. My eyes swelled with tears at the thought of finally being able to do what I loved every single day, and that's exactly what I did - I visited the Arena daily and gamed between classes as much as possible. I walked through the rain and cold so I could continue to game.
I can confidently say that those without technological advancements do not lack in ideas or passion, but rather in resources and support. The notions attached to certain types of technology strongly affect how people perceive video games and online worlds. When accessible, those without exposure to technology tend to ask questions and attempt to use the resource creatively while noting what makes them good or flawed. I found it extremely easy to adapt to various games while my friends with regular exposure to consoles struggled to understand mechanics or derive meaningfulness from simple storylines. While countries like America and Japan have the technological accessibility that other countries dream of, the people who develop these games do not always consider the cultural background or accessibility issues one may have with the game. For example, the Nintendo Switch console does not have servers in India, so Switch users cannot troubleshoot any problems with their consoles. Many popular games have minimal to no servers in the country because of profit loss, preventing many potential players from receiving the experience.
As our cultures and civilizations grow today, we don't realize how badly we're looking for more when we need to develop what we already have. Why do we attempt to do the impossible when the possible isn't perfected? India is an IT hub for technological advancements and we still do not see the value in creative expression. Developed countries are just as doubtful when investing in countries with the potential but lack the resources to try the hobby.
As difficult as it can be, we all deserve to know how creative expression can occur through technology and spread stories of our cultures and beliefs. This technology can impact societies altogether in various manners. Only when we let go of our narrow-minded beliefs on technological accessibility and our capabilities of using it will we realize how much we and others need it. We move steps closer when we implement games in our educational spaces, and we can move further when we see just how much an idea can change the world.
Recently, I finally let go of the idea that I would never be the professional gamer my younger self hoped we would be - one cardinal factor contributing to that was my lack of access to technological advancements and video games like the rest of the world. I imagine many others like me, and I hope that this number gets smaller and smaller as we move forward. Today, I can proudly call myself a gamer - I've experienced consoles of all kinds under various circumstances, and I've finally saved up enough to buy my first console. However insignificant little achievements such as these may be, it is a symbol of advancement and growth to my younger self and my country. I see now that opportunities are always waiting to be taken when we are brave enough to see that games never truly end with a few losses. Looking at my old mouse covered in tape, I hope I never forget where I started.
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